Words of warning and welcome:

This is very much my blog, so don't be surprised if this doesn't follow accepted patterns and norms. Obviously it started out as a blog about my cross-dressing but it has developed a great deal since then. It is a place where I can be anonymous and honest, and I appreciate that.

It will deal with many things and new readers would do well to check out the New Readers' Page above this and the tag down there on the right. Although there's nothing too bad in here there will be adult language, so be careful. If you think this needs a greater control, please let me know. Thank you!

Sunday, 26 February 2012


The purpose of this blog was to record my happiness when dressed, but I haven't been doing much of that lately and so the undeniable happiness that I feel when dressed isn't really peeking through.  In the New Year I resolved to try and be more positive, and lately that has been hard.  It's not that things have been going wrong or that I'm under a particularly unusual set of circumstances, but it is an uphill struggle and I do feel more comfortable being negative about myself and what I do.  However, there are plenty of positives that have happened in the last week and the last few days in particular.  So, here's what's been making me happy lately:

We're really lucky because the woods we have look a lot like these woods
do and they look pretty. My Daughter and I ended up running through them
back to our kingdom because the wind was hunting for us. Also,
blackbirds provided musical accompaniment.
1.  Going for a walk in the woods with my daughter.
  Not just because we had a good time, but also because of the way it came about and the aftermath.  She was getting all fractous, as three-year-olds are wont to do, and I suggested we go on an adventure.  She, surprisingly, agreed and we wandered off into the woodland round where we live (we're lucky like that - it's why I bought the house).  She directed us down a bridle path and I thought "I'm always going on about myth-making and stories, I should make one up here".  So I did.  I already have a working mythos for the woods from when I was taking my son round every evening in Summer, so I simply added a new character: Princess Eowyn (yes, based on my daughter).  She went to see the giants (there's an old quarry, I've previously set it up as a place where giants live with my daughter and there's a dragon that sleeps there sometimes too) and met up with her friend Gwendoline who was out hunting pigs.  Long story short, my daughter loved it, we went looking for dragons to have tea with and then we were both knights on the way home, all at the suggestion of my little girl.  That made me very happy.  Her too.

She's very good. And kind!
2.  Having a caption request made by Tiffany, who is fab at captions.  Given the vague nature of the image request I am amazed that she could make anything at all.  But she did.  And I was first on the list of captions!  This makes me ridiculously happy!  I mean, it's not having fun with my daughter happy but it's still happiness.
Given that my plot synopsis was somewhat... specialised, I'm amazed that she managed to find any image that would work.  I'm really made up by the fact that I requested something and it was made.  Ridiculous, I know, but still.

3.  Getting a 'spike' in the reading stats on this blog - sad but true, I am genuinely made happy and all wibbly inside by that.  Also, I have more followers.  One of them is the incredibly talented Miss Simone - whose blog I only found a couple of nights ago.  I'm honoured by that but also by people who wish to follow the blog.  It makes me happy to think that I'm posting things that other people find vaguely interesting, enough to actually see whan I update.

4.  Snuggling Tilly on Friday night.  She didn't respond, apart from enjoying herself, but it was nice to get all up close and have some physical contact again.  Okay, she complained about the prickly nature of my beard the next time I tried on Saturday, and again today, but it still beats the complete drought that I was experiencing previously.  We do seem to have talked more recently and I've even spoken about having a blog.  I'll be honest, I haven't told her what I write on here, but I did share that it had been helping me be positive lately.  There's a definite cycle in my posts here - I start positive, then it goes down a bit, then there's a tirade of self-obsessed wallowing and then it starts again.  I guess it's helping to see that?

Tilly at her best (stock image,
not actually Tilly)
5.  Tilly being successful.  She set up and ran an entire fair last weekend and is now already planning the next two.  She has new product ideas to support her magazine, which is also running smoothly despite the best efforts of a printer getting things wrong, and has created a strong network of people who help support her.  In essence she is living as a true anarcho-socialist: in that everyone makes money from the ventures that are being run, but they work co-operatively rather than in competition with one another.  Something that I've been striving to do for a long time and Tilly has now achieved.  Now, I would be lying if I said I wasn't jealous, but I am happy that she has managed this.

It's been a bit like this.  With more running.  And me not
looking anywhere near as pretty.  Check out the watch!
6.  Sorting out the crap at work.  There's a colleague having a really bad year of it and supporting him has been very difficult.  However, the fact that this last week has worked and been generally successful has been down to the hard work that I have put in.  I feel happy that my efforts have allowed other people to function like nothing is different and at the same time run a slick full day organisation (that won't run until Tuesday, but the build up has been far less stressful) and all the other things that normally happen.  I mean, sure, I'd have liked more help in making all of that happen, but I won't begrudge it on the grounds that it becomes all my work.  I think everyone likes something that they invest in creatively working or providing what it was supposed to provide.  I feel good that my creative energies over the last week did what they were supposed to.  On that note, I guess I also feel happy about making my own (and my first) caption.  It's no novel and it has a typo, but I made it and it looks passable.  I don't think I'll be making more but it did give me one way of shifting that writer's block that's haunted me since August last year!

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All comments are welcome, I have a thicker skin virtually than I do in real life!